Spring Break
'The Decider' Correct, Hippies Wrong On Iraq
George Maynard
Issue date: 5/6/07 Section: Commentary
We've all read columns by those freedom-hating, anti-American hippies who think that the war in Iraq is a big bust, but real Americans know that these colors don't run. We're going to stay in Iraq until we've accomplished what we went there to do. President Bush has set out a clear list of objectives and we will follow him to victory, because patriotism is about blind faith and unquestioning obedience to authority. Real Americans support things like the PATRIOT Act. How can that be un-American if it has the word patriot in its name? But anyways, back to the matter at hand. Liberal sissies are demanding that we withdraw our troops from Iraq, but that's actually a terrible idea, for quite a few reasons.
First of all, this is a justified war. If it wasn't justified, president Bush would never have sent thousands of soldiers and billions of dollars over there. That should be enough to convince you, but if it's not, think about this; our great commander-in-chief has said that this conflict is worth fighting and polls showed that the majority of Americans supported him when we started this conflict. Now all the sudden you people think that we can just stop fighting a war because it's tough? That's not how it is. If we give up now, we risk having Osama bin Laden call us sissies or weaklings. We can't have the rest of the world thinking America is weak, so we must fight on.
America also has several reasons to be in Iraq and these reasons are reflected in the goals which the president has set forth and accomplished over the past four years.
From the start of this battle for the survival of freedom, Bush said that we are in Iraq to stop the Iraqis from using weapons of mass destruction. Colin Powell testified before the United Nations and we all know that Colin Powell is a good American and wouldn't lie. He assured the U.N. that it was "fact, corroborated by the intelligence agencies of other countries" that Saddam had weapons of mass destruction. I don't know about all of you, but I haven't seen any Iraqi weapons of mass destruction being launched at Americans lately. That leads me to believe that obviously Bush is right and this war in fact prevented Saddam from using the weapons he obviously possessed. It's a good thing we stopped the smoking gun before it became a mushroom cloud, that's for sure.
First of all, this is a justified war. If it wasn't justified, president Bush would never have sent thousands of soldiers and billions of dollars over there. That should be enough to convince you, but if it's not, think about this; our great commander-in-chief has said that this conflict is worth fighting and polls showed that the majority of Americans supported him when we started this conflict. Now all the sudden you people think that we can just stop fighting a war because it's tough? That's not how it is. If we give up now, we risk having Osama bin Laden call us sissies or weaklings. We can't have the rest of the world thinking America is weak, so we must fight on.
America also has several reasons to be in Iraq and these reasons are reflected in the goals which the president has set forth and accomplished over the past four years.
From the start of this battle for the survival of freedom, Bush said that we are in Iraq to stop the Iraqis from using weapons of mass destruction. Colin Powell testified before the United Nations and we all know that Colin Powell is a good American and wouldn't lie. He assured the U.N. that it was "fact, corroborated by the intelligence agencies of other countries" that Saddam had weapons of mass destruction. I don't know about all of you, but I haven't seen any Iraqi weapons of mass destruction being launched at Americans lately. That leads me to believe that obviously Bush is right and this war in fact prevented Saddam from using the weapons he obviously possessed. It's a good thing we stopped the smoking gun before it became a mushroom cloud, that's for sure.
Viewing Comments 1 - 6 of 8
Jerry
posted 5/09/07 @ 5:46 PM EST
Maynard has made it emminently clear that he loves the Iraq war. Yet I do not see his byline listed as Baghdad.
I am sure that Maynard's priorities, ala Cheney, are just more important than actually fighting in the war he loves so much. (Continued…)
Maynard's Cowardice
posted 5/09/07 @ 8:48 PM EST
Jerry makes an excellent point, Maynard. Furthermore, his logic is clear and he has command of the language.
So, Maynard, you still have not answered the question: Why are you not fighting in Iraq? Take your time and write an essay that would at least pass Freshman English. (Continued…)
Maynard (yes I wrote the piece)
posted 5/09/07 @ 9:45 PM EST
whoever wrote the fourth comment had it right, it was a satire. sorry about all that. i'm actually vehemently anti-war and have supported that position in a multitude of columns i've written this year. (Continued…)
jeffreykittens
posted 5/10/07 @ 6:14 PM EST
People actually didn't get that this was satire?
No wonder so many people were offended by the magical rape article.
Maynard
posted 5/12/07 @ 11:14 AM EST
and on the subject of my cowardice. regardless of what my views are, at least i put my name on them instead of leaving them anonymous.
demee007
idiots
posted 5/23/07 @ 11:45 PM EST
How dumb can you get? This is obviously satire.
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