Spring Break
The Top 10 Things To Do With $.78
John Bailey
Issue date: 2/29/08 Section: Focus
10. About a quarter gallon of gas
As of Thursday, the median gas price across the nation is about $3.16. seventy eight cents will get you .247 of a gallon, according to the world of mathematics, and if your (amazingly modern, sleek, fuel-efficient) car gets 40 miles to the gallon, you could travel 9.88 miles! Think about that for a moment. It may not seem like a long distance, but what if there were a huge party, but on the way, your car ran out of gas at the gas station exactly 9.88 miles away? Boy, you'd sure want to have $.78 then. Otherwise, you'd have to tow your car, using only your firm young body and the emergency clothesline you keep for situations like this. You'd be sweaty, and you'd be late.
9. The thoughts of 78 people
People tend to disparage the lowly penny as being outdated, inefficient, even useless in today's high-stakes economy. You can't use it in vending machines, you can't trade for oil with it, you can't even buy penny candy - it all costs at least a nickel! But hey, the penny can be a serious contender, with some creativity. If you had a time machine, you could go back in time and ask George Washington: "Hey, a penny for your thoughts." And George Washington would say "Democracy."
8. Arts and crafts
So you're stuck on a Friday night. You don't have any friends and you don't have a time machine. But you do have 78 cents and your two hands. So hop on down to the crafts store and buy a Popsicle stick, a square of felt, and some googly eyes. Assuming you've got glue, there's your buddy, right there. If you had .79 cents, you could ask me what I thought about a name, and give you some good ideas, but you don't, so you'll probably end up naming it "Shirleybiff" or something.
7. Condoms
Okay, yeah. You're probably sick of condoms. You're probably sick of anything having to do with human contact and you'd rather just go hide in a corner with the collected works of Nietzsche covering your cold, clammy brow. But you know what? It doesn't have to be like that. On the Internet, you can buy a condom for only 20 cents.
As of Thursday, the median gas price across the nation is about $3.16. seventy eight cents will get you .247 of a gallon, according to the world of mathematics, and if your (amazingly modern, sleek, fuel-efficient) car gets 40 miles to the gallon, you could travel 9.88 miles! Think about that for a moment. It may not seem like a long distance, but what if there were a huge party, but on the way, your car ran out of gas at the gas station exactly 9.88 miles away? Boy, you'd sure want to have $.78 then. Otherwise, you'd have to tow your car, using only your firm young body and the emergency clothesline you keep for situations like this. You'd be sweaty, and you'd be late.
9. The thoughts of 78 people
People tend to disparage the lowly penny as being outdated, inefficient, even useless in today's high-stakes economy. You can't use it in vending machines, you can't trade for oil with it, you can't even buy penny candy - it all costs at least a nickel! But hey, the penny can be a serious contender, with some creativity. If you had a time machine, you could go back in time and ask George Washington: "Hey, a penny for your thoughts." And George Washington would say "Democracy."
8. Arts and crafts
So you're stuck on a Friday night. You don't have any friends and you don't have a time machine. But you do have 78 cents and your two hands. So hop on down to the crafts store and buy a Popsicle stick, a square of felt, and some googly eyes. Assuming you've got glue, there's your buddy, right there. If you had .79 cents, you could ask me what I thought about a name, and give you some good ideas, but you don't, so you'll probably end up naming it "Shirleybiff" or something.
7. Condoms
Okay, yeah. You're probably sick of condoms. You're probably sick of anything having to do with human contact and you'd rather just go hide in a corner with the collected works of Nietzsche covering your cold, clammy brow. But you know what? It doesn't have to be like that. On the Internet, you can buy a condom for only 20 cents.
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