Spring Break
Long-distance loves must be creative, committed
Alex Sanders
Issue date: 3/20/09 Section: Commentary
Melissa White goes to York College in Pennsylvania and her boyfriend of 14 months, Warren Inzinga, lives five hours away in Connecticut. They make their long-distance relationship work.
They often go four to six weeks without seeing each other, so they do things together over the phone and try to talk on a daily basis.
"Every night I call him and I tell him I love him, whether it's (over) a voicemail or text message or anything," she said. It is easier to break up when two people are apart, and fighting is difficult when it happens, White said. But they take time to collect their thoughts and resolve arguments because they believe their relationship is worth it.
This is an example of just one of the many long-distance relationships that work. However, many others end up failing because the people involved in the relationship don't put in enough effort.
"I don't think everybody can have a long-distance relationship," White said. "It's more of a personality thing. When you're upset or angry you can't always look for that other person to lean on. It's like you love the person so much, but you have to be able to live without them."
Long-distance relationships can work in the long run, but they require trust, boundaries and solid communication. Also, distance and time matter more than some may think.
If a couple is together for a year, but the relationship is mostly based on physical attraction, it probably won't work. And if two people live in states on opposite sides of the country, that also probably won't work.
There is always the optimistic hope portrayed in fairy tales. There is also true, real, pure love out there. But in college, it is hard to know how true that love actually is, and it is difficult to predict a relationship's future.
For seniors, graduation is just around the corner and many people will move away from their alma maters or return to far-away hometowns while their beloveds still attend the university they left behind.
They often go four to six weeks without seeing each other, so they do things together over the phone and try to talk on a daily basis.
"Every night I call him and I tell him I love him, whether it's (over) a voicemail or text message or anything," she said. It is easier to break up when two people are apart, and fighting is difficult when it happens, White said. But they take time to collect their thoughts and resolve arguments because they believe their relationship is worth it.
This is an example of just one of the many long-distance relationships that work. However, many others end up failing because the people involved in the relationship don't put in enough effort.
"I don't think everybody can have a long-distance relationship," White said. "It's more of a personality thing. When you're upset or angry you can't always look for that other person to lean on. It's like you love the person so much, but you have to be able to live without them."
Long-distance relationships can work in the long run, but they require trust, boundaries and solid communication. Also, distance and time matter more than some may think.
If a couple is together for a year, but the relationship is mostly based on physical attraction, it probably won't work. And if two people live in states on opposite sides of the country, that also probably won't work.
There is always the optimistic hope portrayed in fairy tales. There is also true, real, pure love out there. But in college, it is hard to know how true that love actually is, and it is difficult to predict a relationship's future.
For seniors, graduation is just around the corner and many people will move away from their alma maters or return to far-away hometowns while their beloveds still attend the university they left behind.
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Long Distance Relationships
posted 3/25/09 @ 9:00 AM EST
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Thanks
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